Mad, Bad, Sad

I am a seething mass of anger. I hate being angry. Well, I don't mind if I have a good reason, but in my opinion, there just aren't that many good reasons to be angry, unless it has to do with the oppression of the powerless, or someone taking your parking spot. Bastards. Maybe that's why I haven't been posting lately (you're still talking about not posting? shut UP already, about the not posting) I'm too pissed to post, which is not unlike being too pooped to pop. Things I'm hopping mad about include:

1. I'm hopping mad.
2. my children losing the USB cord I just ordered, and the kitchen timer, and my keys because they do not understand the concept of not playing with stuff that's not a toy. Grrrrrrrrrr.
3. my dog jumping on the kitchen chair and eating the lunch leftovers. Well, at least she has the courtesy to wait until we're through with the meal.
4. my husband who asked disdainfully "Did you put ketchup on my burger?" And then when I said yes asked "Why?" Gosh, darling I'm a tad colorblind, and I guess I mistook the red ketchup for the green ARSENIC PASTE I meant to put on your hamburger. I'll try not to make that mistake again.
5. Sugar. I ate two bowls of peanut butter Mini Swirlz for breakfast, which is probably why I'm feeling so murderous for no good reason.
6. The fact that I ate a cereal that spells swirls with a Z, and whose slogan is "It's like flavor to the 10th power, without the math!" I'll give you flavor to the tenth power. Bastards.
7. I'm fat. See #5
8. The stupid satellite receiver keeps overheating, and I have to reset the thing all the time, and it takes me about 20 minutes to get the TV to work. What am I? A Pilgrim? What's next? Starting fire by rubbing sticks together?
9. That my children are bickering like the endangered Bickering Hyena. And I can't send them to school in two weeks. Actually that one makes me feel like crying.
10. That I'm treating my kids like crap today. That one makes me feel like crying too.

Maybe I need to go have a good cry.

Comments

[Jenny]

Mini. Trampoline.

Jump until you puke.

That's my stellar advice.

[dirty]

Wow...you summed it up...I totally know how you feel. I suggest a mom vacation...you, feet up, favorite drink in hand and a chick flick (and the kids have to be in bed and the husband has to either watch and love it or leave you alone)...this usually works for me.

[Sabrina]

I hope things get better soon. Sound like perfectly good reasons to be mad to me! Hang in there!

[momcani]

Nachos and Smirnoff Ice,and a chick flick. Tomorrow is another day. Next time buy Cheerios, cry, and pour the ketchup on your husbands head. Then say, "oh. sorry".

But trust me on the nachos and Smirnoff Ice. I swear they are medicinal!

[Reé]

Oh, do I know days like this! Years, in fact. I'm sorry you're in the know too.

You know what's been helping me a lot lately? Just letting myself be mad, like it's just one more thing on my To-Do list that I'll eventually check off before moving on to the next thing. I noticed that the more I resisted it or beat myself up over the frustration of being smart enough to recognize the pointlessness but helpless to fall prey regardless, the longer it lasted.

Maybe my suggestion will make you madder, I dunno. Thought I'd toss it out here anyway in case it could help.

[liz]

Sounds like those are all good reasons to be frustrated on their own and together...YOW!

[Xangelle]

Sorry you're having a crappy day! Hope a good one crawls along sometime soon, until then a bottle of wine (or 2) might help!

[lizardek]

I second Momcani's advice about the ketchup.

[Ellen]

I can't believe you "wasted" your sugar calories on kids cereal when you could have had a box of Krispy Kreme donuts instead! Mmmmm... donuts.

[Marilyn]

I'd say Aaron owes you a day away to play...

[That Girl]

Repeat after me. You are NOT FAT. Do not buy intot his anorexia-loving culture myth that women of normal size and shape are fat.
You are not fat.
Eating sugar does not make you a fat person, or someone who has no willpower.
Marilyn Monroe was a healthy size 14.
You are NOT fat.
As for the rest of them - well, grab a cup of whatever soothes you. Take a deep breath, we ALL have bad mommy days. Is that what you remember about YOUR mom? Didnt think so. They will not remember. They will in fact forget a lot sooner than you will.
Tell Aaron you will keep putting ketchup on his hamburgers til he finds the USB cord and your keys. If this seems unfair to him, welcome him into the club. Motherhood is enitrely unfair.

[Kimmie]

Love #4....why don't they understand the kids aren't the only problem and they are at least 80% of it???????

[marian]

Wish I could come over and whisk you away for awhile. Is whisk a word?

Yes, the combination of two bowls of mini swirlz and knowing that you aren't sending your kids to school in the fall.... that's killer.

A good cry couldn't hurt.

[Erin]

Remember the days when you used to feel like this so you just spent the day alone? Hahahahah! Oh my God, sometimes I would just love one day to myself. I would sleep. I would hike if I weren't pregnant. OR go sit and have a glass of wine by myself and a really good meal...if I weren't pregnant. Let's all cry together.

[Erin]

OH, let me just say it's not that I don't want to be pregnant, but I could do without the illness part of it. I guess I needed a little disclaimer for that, you know, like, I don't really, really want to kill my husband...

[Talin]

I think you need a little Sheryl time.. I know I get really mad about almost nothing when I am stretching myself too thin.

Once I was so mad about not being able to find my good jeans that I pulled the dresser drawer out of the dresser (because the damn drawer wouldn't open) and I threw it onto to bed where it bounced up and punched a hole into the wall!!

I know all about being a "seething mass of anger" and I know this comment will probably make you mad, but it is all in the way you choose to see things! A positive outlook will make bad things seem not so bad.. This is easier said than done- but it's just my 2 cents!!

Hope you have a better day!!

[bad penguin]

You may be mad, but you're still awfully funny! "What am I, a Pilgrim?" cracked me up.

Sometimes a good cry is just the thing.

[Sam]

You're the funniest mad person ever. Hopefully you're not even more mad, because I'm trying to be sweet to you, so let me, okay?

Honey, let me chime in and say, yes, you need some Sheryl time. Do it. Work doesn't count, because, well, you're WORKING. So treat yourself kindly, sweet girl. You deserve the best, even on days when you're not feeling that way.

[Fraulein N]

Awww. I hope today's at least a little bit better.

[ali]

oh my gosh - what are peanut butter mini swirls??? they sound awesome!

[Susan]

I've spent the day unplugging my modem and plugging it back in so that I can get TWENTY SECONDS of live high-speed internet before the goddamned thing goes out again. But fortunately, the cable people can send someone out IN THREE WEEKS to help me!

Fuckers.

Pass those mini swirlz.

[Africableu]

I would like to say I'm sorry you're so mad, but that would be a lie. I'm actually tickled pink you're so mad, because it makes you write posts like this, which in turn makes me chortle like a nutty-bar and starts my day off with a grin.

So, while I'd like to say I'm sorry, I can't.

Sorry about that.

[sweetney]

i think i'm going to take that mini-trampoline jump-til-you-puke advice.

thanks, paper napkin!

oh and is there something in the water these days or what? everyone i know has been going through big emotional turmoil of late (including me). [shakes fist at universe]

[hannah]

The first few times I read the "to pooped to pop" I thought it was "to pooped to poop" and I was wondering who were these people that came up with these things?

[Blue Gal]

The pre-school starting blues. I know them well. I'm with the beer, junk food, and chick flick crowd. School will start before you know it. Then there's carpool. Ugh.